What if guilt was no longer a part of your life?
Do you find yourself consumed by guilt throughout your life? You feel guilty when you are working. You feel guilty when you aren’t working. You feel guilty as a spouse or parent, like you aren’t measuring up?
Want a quick, easy way to make healthier, more “boundaried” decisions in all areas of your life that ELIMINATES guilt from the equation entirely?
I have a simple, practical tip: Refuse to make decisions from a feeling of guilt, particularly if you have done or are doing nothing wrong! Yep…you heard me correctly. You can CHOOSE to eliminate guilt from your life.
Here’s how. (All of these are examples from real-life conversations I’ve had this week with clients!)
“I let my kids spend money we don’t have on things they don’t need because I feel guilty that my job requires I work some weekends.”
My reply—Is it wrong to work on the weekends if this is a requirement of your job? If not, and if in fact said job pays for everything your kids have, then do NOT make a decision about giving into their whining for things they don’t need from a space of guilt.
“I feel guilty leaving my kids with my husband while I go to the gym to work out.”
My reply—Is it wrong to leave your children with their PARENT so you can take care of your body and health? If not and if you being healthy makes you a BETTER mom or dad to them, then don’t make a decision from a place of guilt.
“I am off today for the holiday and am choosing to not respond to texts and emails that have been coming in all day but I feel guilty that other people are working and I’m not.”
My reply—Is it wrong to not work on your day off? (Sounds funny to even say that out loud!) If not, then let other people work if they want to. Their boundaries are not yours. Take the day off and CHOOSE to enjoy it!
“I feel guilty calling someone on their poor performance at work. I don’t want them to feel bad, and I don’t want to be mean.”
My reply—Is it wrong to ask someone to do the job they applied for and signed a contract to do? If they aren’t performing the tasks for which they were hired, then why are they being paid? Addressing poor performance not only isn’t mean; it’s actually the most positive action you can take for the good of the business or organization.
Are you tracking here?
We misuse guilt in so many ways and it doesn’t serve us.
If you are doing nothing wrong, then set down the guilt and make decisions from a healthier, more grounded space.
If you want to learn more about how to eliminate guilt from your life, my online courses, “A Boundary is Not A Wall,” and “A Healthy Boundary Is Not Mean” are great places to start!